Fredo D. Stefani
Fredo first came to the attention of the league during Season I as a regular leader of the casualty charts despite playing for a lacklustre team. He finished the season the joint leader in casualties, alongside Bull the Butcher, and was considered one of the key players in the Sabres' cup-winning side. During the season break, he was approached by a record agent and began a pop career, with hits like "We Will Block You", "I Want to Blitz Free" and "I Want the Ball I Want It Now". His off-the-pitch profile made him one of the Sabres' greatest marketing assets, along with Morr E.N. Tezz, and he entered into a number of lucrative sponsorship deals. League commissioner Crow provoked a controversy in Season II by seeming to assert that Fredo's inability to recapture his Season I form was due to a change in his performance-enhancing-drugs regimen. Spike! Magazine ran a feature on the subject which totally failed to clear anything up. Before their match that season, Fancy Lads owner houlio suggested that Fredo and his team-mate "Fat" Ronald were escaped convicts. The truth of the matter was never uncovered, despite investigation by KO! Magazine. While travelling to a friendly game against a non-league amateur club side, The Prophecies, Fredo was shot with a poison arrow, apparently as part of a revenge plot orchestrated by a disgruntled ex-girlfriend. He survived with no lasting ill-effects. Rumours of a relationship between Fredo and Valkyrie catcher Skeggjöld have never been officially confirmed. In Season III, Fredo represented the Sabres at the Grintoof Snotling Destruction Derby, defeating Max Dryhauser of Hellbug's Heroes in the final and receiving a pair of Grintoof Rogre brand gloves as a prize. His reckless killing of two snotlings during the course of the event cost the Sabres treasury $40,000. This came shortly after he was named as the second-sexiest player in the league in that season, jointly with Danforth of The Fancy Lads. After All-Star Week of Season III, Fredo was apparently hired by Crow to assassinate his successor Kurokotetsu and allow Crow to regain control of the league. According to Crow, Fredo "failed to get the job done, yet again", but kurokotetsu disappeared soon afterwards and seems to have gone into hiding anyway. Fredo again represented the Sabres at the Snotling Destruction Derby in Season IV and was again victorious, taking out a total of 27 Snotlings including another two kills and being gifted another pair of Rogre gloves for his efforts. He was also one of two players sent by the Sabres to the All-Division match. Late in the season he was injured by Blind Faith while playing in the Sabres' bye week for The Johnnys' Quest and sustained a serious concussion. After the Sabres' semifinal defeat in Season IV, Fredo retired and was soon admitted to the Hall of Fame. Early in Season V he took a coaching position with the league's new human team, the Talabheim Eagles. Category:Players Category:Humans Category:Blitzers Category:Star Players Category:Superstars Category:Coaching Staff